Be Like Water: A Survival Guide to Parenting Teenage Girls

I never truly understood what Bruce Lee meant when he said, “Be like water” — until recently.

If you have children, especially daughters, you know this: once they reach their teenage years, they seem to transform into an entirely different species. I mean a completely different species. It’s like being strapped into a roller coaster you never
signed up for, with no exit and questionable safety standards.

Growing up in communist Romania taught me valuable survival skills—skills that, surprisingly, apply perfectly to parenting teenagers in Los Angeles. One of these is the ability to adapt quickly and make decisions under pressure.

When my daughters ask me for things—which happens daily—it’s rarely a simple yes or no. It’s more of a do-or-die decision. I know a quick “yes” usually avoids conflict, but my real goal is to understand what that “yes” will ultimately cost or earn me.

I learned—by necessity, not by choice—that giving them what they want often buys me peace for the rest of the day. Instead of dreading their requests, which can sometimes be unreasonable and costly, I began to see them as opportunities for
leverage.